Episode Transcript

What’s up? What’s up? What’s up, everybody? Welcome back to THE a.m. Welcome back to five minute rants. The show predicated on the journey of life and business. I’m your host, Michael Abernathy. Welcome back, everyone. Thanks for tuning in.

So guys, today, I wanted to talk about the art of losing. And I think this is really important. It’s really interesting to me, just looking at a lot of how the world works. And oftentimes, we really get caught up in focusing on the wrong things. And I think losing is one of those. So for instance, it is very easy to win. It is very easy. When you win at something in sports, in life in business, whatever you’re doing, you win a deal, you’ve negotiated, you’ve done your share all that stuff, and you got a signed contract, it’s really easy to win, there’s not a lot of pain to go through, there’s not a lot of reflection points, none of that. But when you lose, that’s a whole different scenario.

And I don’t think that we’ve been taught how to lose, and I think a lot of people don’t know how to lose. And as a result, we live life running away from risk, simply because we’re afraid of the pain of losing. And losing actually isn’t a painful thing. Losing is just a fact, hey, this happened. And I think that losing is often painful for us, because we actually tie it to our self worth, we tie it to who we think we are and What we’re worth, and how we’re how we’re going to function as a person and all these things. And it’s not really true. I think that losing is just something that happens, right? Whether it’s a deal, or whether you’re in sports, or whether you’re just moving forward, like you know, you have a door closed on you, okay, cool, the doors closed, it’s time to move on and look for the next entry point with wherever you’re trying to do, whatever you’re trying to do, and wherever you’re trying to go.

And oftentimes, we just we get stuck, because we’re so afraid of losing. And we’re so afraid of taking risks. And even people who like if you’re thinking about starting your own thing, and you’re thinking about winning. I mean, you’re thinking about the risk of losing if you’re going to start your own thing, and What if it doesn’t work out? What if it? What if it doesn’t happen? What if it doesn’t go the way I want it to go, you’re worried about losing, you’re not actually focused on the company that you’re trying to start You’re not actually focused on moving forward, you’re just tied up in the What if I lose? And the question is, is if you lose, guess What? You just start over, Right? And yes, there are things that you can risk. And there are things at risk when making decisions. But even still, okay, you just start over and you keep moving forward.

And I think it really comes back to how we’re raised how we’re raising our kids. And we put so much weight of our personal value and of our personal decision making on losing. And whether I should call that person, whether and I’m talking about like, just think about this, like you’re doing sales, or you’re just trying to networking, get connected. And so many times we won’t even go up and talk to the person simply because we’re afraid of losing afraid of being told no. And all of that is so superficial. If you can get past that and really see like, okay, cool, it’s not a good fit right now, for whatever is going to happen. You literally have nothing to lose at that point, if you just going up and saying hello. And I think that it comes back to just being tiny in our self worth. And if you get told no, it has nothing to do with What you’re worth or not. If you get told no, if you if you try and launch a project, you try and launch an offering, and it falls flat on its face, okay? That has nothing to do with your worth, your character, your value, your principles are so much more than just something taking off, or work taking off or a project taking off or not. There’s so much more to it than that.

And I think I’m saying this because it is so easy to get caught up in it, the pain and avoidance of losing versus cool. I’m going to learn and grow and then just keep moving forward. And focus on What really matters, focus on the things that do matter. And so like you’re thinking about charging different prices for services you offered, you’re thinking about negotiating deals, you’re thinking about all these things. And it’s like you don’t have anything to lose, like you’re sitting across the table from somebody, you don’t even have the deal. You’re worried about losing and you don’t even have the deal on the other side of the table. And you don’t even have that relationship or partnership yet with the person. And so I’m saying this because there’s such an art to losing. And if you can learn how to how to lose if you can learn how to maintain your emotional intelligence and your mentality after you lose to just move on and keep moving forward. Life is going to change radically business is going to change radically. Everything in your world is going to change radically. And if you can learn how to lose you’re actually learning how to win because at that point you can own you can learn you can grow you improve in everything is going to change from that standpoint.

Anyways guys, I’m out of time. I’ll catch y’all later. Peace