Episode Transcript

What’s up? What’s up? What’s up everybody? Welcome back to THE a.m guys. Welcome back to five minute rants. I’m your host, Michael Abernathy. And welcome back to the show predicated on the journey of life and business. Hey guys, real quick, would you partner with me and spread the word? If you know somebody whose life would be better by listen to the show Would you share it with them? I appreciate it.

Well, today I wanted to talk about blameshifting, I want to talk about blameshifting, because honestly, blameshifting is one of the fastest ways to either tear down What you’re currently doing. Or it is one of the number one blocks to keep you from moving forward into What you should be doing. And when we started to point the finger at everybody else, but ourselves and not take ownership, and not really move forward into accepting that things are our fault. What happens is, is we now tie ourselves down into a place where we are no longer in control, we don’t have the authority to make decisions, we don’t have the right to take better actions. And now we have self victimized ourselves through blameshifting, blaming co workers for being late to meetings, or always having to fix everybody’s problems or whatever is happening, blaming other people, friends blaming situations, it’s the trains fault that I’m late, it’s this that and

When we begin to blame shift, we automatically self victimized and when we victimize ourselves. At that point, we have now entrapped ourselves really pretty much in a lie about how the reality of the situation is because the reality is, is you are 100% responsible for your life at all times, people all people are whether we want to acknowledge it or not. I’m 100% responsible for my life at all times, I’m 100% responsible for the decisions I’m supposed to make or should make. I’m responsible for planning out my life, I’m responsible for learning. It’s interesting, because earlier I was thinking about how you know, especially with having children, I want to I want to teach my kids how to eat and be healthy how to think about health, not just hey, you eat this, you don’t need that. Giving right and wrong answers to everything is actually unhelpful to people, it can be extremely hurtful.

Because What matters more is going back to that old saying, Give a man a fish, you’ll feed him for a day, teach him to fish, and he’ll live for the rest of his life, he’ll be able to eat for the rest of his life. What you need to do for yourself is one learn to think and be able to think but then if you’re in charge of helping other people or raising kids like What I’m talking about. Now, the goal is to help them think to teach them how to think how to critically assess situations how to logically walk through things. But if you’re going to do that, step one is you can’t blame shift, you have to have full ownership for What is happening in your life. And then you have to have a process, a methodical framework to walk through your thoughts to walk through the actions you’ve taken to understand and identify the problem. And the root problem in your life that is either causing the fire causing the pain, the frustration, whatever it is.

And it’s so interesting because especially in business, business really forces victimisation out in a lot of other ways in life where it can remain hidden and covered up. And it’s interesting because when you make enough money, you don’t have to own as much because if you make enough money to cover up your blameshifting, it works. And so the question now becomes, as do you just want to own because you made a promise to yourself to be a better person do you want to own because you made a promise to yourself to be a CEO who actually cares about his people who actually wants to serve the people underneath him? Do you want to own because you made a promise to yourself that you were going to be somebody different. And that’s really where you should be where we should be in it really should be making identity choices, and then taking actions based on that person that we want to be.

And I think that blameshifting is so destructive, it will actually tear down What you’re building. So the moment you begin blameshifting know that you’re going backwards, the moment that there’s not ownership or acceptance and when you go through hard situations or when big problems arise, or different things happen or you failed. Just know like cool. That’s the temptation always in front of you is to blame shift.

The question is, Will you do it or not? Will you take ownership? Will you see your part in it? Will you see your responsibility in it? And then will you accept your responsibility? And that’s really the question. This is more of a question of if you’re going to accept your responsibility. And it’s not to put more weight or burden on you and it’s not to tear you down. But it’s really about giving yourself a pathway forward because if you’re responsible for causing it, you’re also responsible for changing it. And that’s the bigger picture than all of this.

Well guys, that’s it for today. So catch you later peace